Kids, I’m not going to lie to you.
This was a bad one.
Real bad.
Possibly the worst game for the Vancouver Canucks of the Rick Tocchet Era.
But here’s the good news. Jim Benning trained me for moments like this. You don’t go through almost an entire decade of watching a team play terrible hockey without changing who you are as a person. Some of you adopted the darkness. I was born in it, moulded by it.
So I can tell you that this loss will be ok. You will get past it. This season will continue on. The team will probably make the playoffs before some combination of injuries, Connor McDavid, and/or someone distantly related to Colin Campbell lines up on the other side, ending the season early once again.
The main talking point that should be taken away from this game is the inconsistency of the team you see in front of you. It’s real nice beating up a tired Calgary Flames team, but when they needed to put on their big boy shoes against the New York Islanders, they fell flat on their faces. I’m not sure if I saw the Canucks get into the GOTI more than a handful of times in this game.
And sure, give the Islanders credit for playing a strong game (they did), but you can’t lose the majority of the board battles during a game like this. For a team that likes to blindly fling the puck around the boards, their inability to cut off the puck along the glass is baffling. It’s akin to me claiming to love a good midnight burrito on a road trip but also refusing to crack open the window. You have to line up your strategies better than that.
And the few times where the Canucks did set up in the offensive zone, it just felt like the Canucks were content to run cardio drills around the perimeter of the ice.
The biggest debate about this game will be who tried less on the Islanders fourth goal, Filip Hronek, who seemingly felt that staring directly into his goaltender’s eyes was the right call, or JT Miller doing that 1,000-yard stare “back check” he perfected under Bruce Boudreau.
It was a garbage result from a garbage game, with the fans paying the ultimate price in the form of hard-earned money spent on tickets.
The Canucks will be better next game, and not just because the bar was set so low. They don’t often have that many bad games in a row.
But we’re at the point now where you have to wonder where on the scale does this team land in terms of the team we saw last year and the team we are seeing this season.
Will the real Vancouver Canucks please stand up?
Best in his own words
Rick Tocchet usually has a solid 10-minute chat session after each game, win or loss — never too high, never too low sort of thing. The team could win 20-0, and he’d still probably be bummed about Nils Höglander not circling back quick enough. Same thing if the team lost 20-0, he’d probably point out that a mistake is just a new friend you haven’t met yet or whatever it is Randy Newman sings about.
So, if you want to know if this game rattled him, the four-minute post-game scrum certainly points to that.
We, in fact, didn’t even get to ask a question; he walked in and asked if he could start, and his speech is worth the long transcript:
“Don’t ask me about individual players today, no offence. I got to apologize to the fans. We’re not playing good enough at home; it’s on me. Guys played light tonight. I thought we were ready to go; we weren’t, it’s on me. I got to get this team to play harder in the first period. Spurts here and there but not enough from a lot of guys. So we gotta go practice tomorrow and get back to the drawing board…so don’t ask about individual players, I’m not going to answer that. You guys saw it. Thanks.”
Yes, he said no offence in his speech; you’re allowed to giggle at that.
He then went on to talk about fans spending hundreds of dollars on tickets and about Patrick Roy out-coaching him, and that’s honestly him taking all of the bullets for his team.
Patrick Roy won the battle of the coaches, but Rick painted it as if he was some dumb-dumb who got destroyed by an evil genius. Which is why you have to learn what Rick is like, and when you ask him questions about strategies, that’s when he shows you the real insight.
Normally Daniel Wagner is the Tocchet whisperer (I never see two people light up like Tocchet and Wagner do when discussing in-game strategies), but this time, Pat Johnston (hail gold and blue) asked coach Tocchet about the neutral zone adjustments, and he let slip a bit of a look under the hood:
“We were just shy tonight and we’re guessing where the puck is. It just drives me nuts when forward one guesses where the puck is. Your job is to go through a guy, or at least mark him, and we’re coming off him, we’re going to the next guy, and they’re popping it to the guy you just left.”
Clearly, the loss wasn’t all on Rick Tocchet, as much as he wants you to believe, but he’s not wrong in that he has to find a way to get his team to buy into the game plan far more consistently than they have this season.
Best feel good moment
Welcome back, Dakota Joshua!
I’m so sorry this was your return game.
Best Killer goal
The Canucks have made a habit out of being scored on first (yet somehow still winning), so perhaps we should have seen the loss coming when Vancouver opened up the scoring first:
As one Islanders fan on BlueSky broke it down:
“Mayfield had three options here:
1) Cover the shooter
2) Cover the passer
3) Cover neither
He chose option three. Only five more years after this season!”
Or, as another Islanders fan described it:
“I hate Scott Mayfield with the fire of 1,000 suns.”
See? Every fan base has more in common than you think. Who in this fan base hasn’t cursed the name of Erik Gudbranson and pondered the fire of 1,000 suns at one point?
The most notable part about this is that this was the final moment in which those fans actually thought their team might lose.
As for the goal itself, Jonathan Lekkerimäki got his first career biscuit in front of his family, and it was very on-brand: Finding a way to get a shot off no matter what because that’s what Killer does.
It was heart-warming to see his parents with tears in their eyes watching their son score his first career goal, and that, along with the return of Dakota Joshua, were truly the only two good things to happen in this game for Vancouver.
Best those were the days
Look how naive I was making this gif, getting ready to compile a list of good things the Canucks did. Ah, good times, good times:
“It will be funny if this was the best thing Bo Horvat does all game,” is something I actually thought to myself.
It’s during these low points that I remind myself that at least I don’t have to write about Jayson Megna on the power play ever again.
Best sign of things to come
As the shot clock slowly began rising for the Islanders, I took a moment to make a gif just for Thomas Drance.
You see, he thinks the NHL has too much soft interference, a situation where a player “accidentally” gets in the skating lane of another player, thus slowing them down.
And Anders Lee gave me a perfect example of this tonight when he, whoops, sorry bro, just scooching by here’d Jake DeBrusk:
It buys just enough time for the Islanders to move the puck across the ice for a shot, and it’s not egregious enough for an NHL referee to call a penalty unless your name is Tim Peel and you just wanted to get one in.
I don’t think we will ever see the NHL come down on this like they did with actual interference back in 2005, mostly because they never want anything to overshadow that magical 68-point season from Bryan McCabe that resulted from it, but also because I just think it’s too hard to call this consistently.
If the league struggles to tell you what goaltender interference is, I shudder to think what a game would look like if an official had to figure out if a player meant to skate in a player’s path or not.
Best he warned you
I just feel like JT was visited by Julie Matthews, who warned him that this game wasn’t going to end well for him.
That, or he wound up for a 100mph clap bomb and instead ended up splooging the puck forward a couple of feet:
This is why he slammed his stick on the boards, and not just because he’s more of an Oakwyn Realty guy.
Best and here comes the collapse
You have to remember, this power play goal merely made it 1-1, and we all just sort of thought it would work itself out somehow:
Usually with power play goals I don’t get too heated about breakdowns in coverage, because that’s sort of the whole deal with penalty killing. Defend until you break, and often, when you break, it’s ugly.
But I will say that Tyler Myers completely losing sight of Jean-Gabriel Pageau wasn’t the greatest defence I’ve seen on a penalty kill? I know he sometimes laser focuses in on the puck; it’s sort of his deal. But yeah, it felt like the tip of the diamond just assumed Anders Lee was going to shoot so he just sort of watched it play out.
It’s also possible Chaos Giraffe knew the backdoor play was there but just assumed he could block the pass with his stick? His belief in himself is very high, so we can’t count that out.
Look, I’m just buying time before I have to discuss the second period.
Best maybe you should instigate
Quinn Hughes getting beat up will be the strategy most teams employ as the season wears on, and when you play 27 minutes a night, you’ll have ample opportunity to do so:
That’s 6’3″, 210-pound Maxim Tsyplakov deciding to run over your son Quinn Hughes in front of your house.
Now, normally I am not a huge fan of the fights that break out after a big hit, especially a clean one. Love it or hate it, you have to admit if Kiefer Sherwood trucked a team’s captain like that, you’d be scrambling to play Jock Jam’s Greatest Hits on Spotify while you decided how many fire emojis to use on your post about it. That’s a shoulder-on-shoulder crime, and that’s a tremendous hit.
With all that said, if someone hits your captain like that, just drop the gloves, man. Vincent Desharnais tried to engage Maxim in a fight, but Tsyplakov just skated away from it, and Vinnie, my friend, just drop the gloves. Take the instigator if you have to, but if a team runs over your boy, you best let them know. Give him a stone-cold stunner, give the double fingers, catch a couple of beers in the penalty box, and you’ve done your job for the night.
Especially after a team already took liberties with another one of your star players in Brock Boeser, I would really want someone to step up there. And I say that as a guy who, again, doesn’t love the “oh you HIT us? You dared to use a body check in the game of hockey against us?? WE MUST FIGHT” mentality.
A man’s gotta have a code, though. And if they take out Quinn Hughes, you take them out, it’s very simple.
Best tipped goal
To be fair, it was a gorgeous tip that completely fooled the goalie:
The problem was it was on Kevin Lankinen.
There is an elegant beauty and sadness in the way Kevin goes for the save, only to realize at the last second that the knife in his back was, in fact, from Judas.
To add insult to injury, they gave an assist on that goal to Bo Horvat, and I’m sorry, but at what point do we not adopt soccer rules and just start handing out own goals?
I for one, would love a list of players at the end of the season who scored on their own net. It’s long been a proud tradition in Vancouver to tuck one in behind your netminder. Give us the true stats we deserve.
How are you going to tell me Horvat deserves an assist for JT Miller scoring on his own guy? Where was the game plan behind that assist?
You didn’t deserve that, Bo, and if you were a real leader, you’d call the NHL tomorrow and demand they revoke that assist.
Best J-Pats impression
Noah out here putting Jeff to shame with the sobering tweets.
Just kidding, J-Pat drops a couple of beauties in a few moments.
Hey, remember when Carson Soucy used to be a top-four D-man who forged an unlikely but tremendous partnership with Tyler Myers?
What happened to that?
To say Soucy has been struggling this season would be an understatement. That second pairing has been one of the weak spots of the team this year, and once again, it found itself just sort of existing in a game of hockey. Not sure what they were doing, really. At one point, I think Soucy tried to bust out a pose that Ray Gun would have been proud of?
All I know is you cannot let Pierre Engvall box you out in front of your own goalie. I get it, he’s 6″5, but Soucy is 6″5 and Tyler Myers is at least 8″2, between the two of you, how are you letting a guy set up shop in your crease like that?
For whatever reason, this duo has not been on the same page this season. Watch the clip again, they both get caught up puck watching, both turning in unison to react to the play, rather than being proactive. The coverage is worse than Telus.
Sorry, TELUS.
For some reason, they’ve demanded it be in all capitals, and you know what? BC Tel never would have done this to us.
Best and yet
Rick Tocchet split up the defensive pairings for an extended period of time during the second frame, something we rarely see in this city. Filip Hronek had to play without his safety blanket, and the team seemed to respond? Kind of? I think?
At the very least, I finally got clips of the Canucks in the Islanders zone?
Up first, we had Dakota Joshua making a spirited forecheck coupled with a nice pass to Aatu Räty in the slot:
Now, if that’s Conor Garland, that’s a goal because he’s right-handed. Part of me just assumes Joshua misses his buddy and was sending a pass to where he knows Corolla likes it.
Either way, the Canucks didn’t score, but they did get another good look on net in the form of a shot from Killer:
I think that’s the last good thing JT Miller did in this game, so savour it while you can. It actually was a slick play, you can see him set up shop away from the boards to cut off the pass to the middle, and he immediately know he’s passing it over to the rookie.
And damn it, that’s an Alex Ovechkin-style tumble in an attempt to get that shot off; I am here for it Killer. You want to try and one time a puck, why not throw a little splash of fun on it?
Quinn Hughes then attempted to do Quinn Hughes things by dancing along the blue line and firing in a wrist shot at a screened goalie, only to miss the net:
The problem is you’ll notice none of these were very scary. Not even in a fun Hugh Grant way where he’s still playing the same rom-com guy he always does, except this time he’s a murderer? There was none of that behind these chances.
In fact, none of them were registered as high-danger chances, and it won’t surprise you to find out the Canucks only got two high-danger chances all game compared to the Islanders eleven.
Honestly, there was one point where you were truly wondering if the Canucks were going to break into the double digits in shots.
Islanders protected the GOTI like a political joke I can’t make because people are tired, and we can’t laugh anymore because everything feels sad.
Best sure why not
The NHL Generously called this fighting, and hey, at least Vinnie got his dance with someone:
Once again, no shots were recorded for the Canucks.
Best don’t forget Kevin at home
The sad thing is, without Kevin Lankinen in net, this game could have been far worse.
With the Canucks down 3-1 and being unable to get anywhere in the neutral zone, struggling with zone entries, they ended up getting caught deep as they tried to set up a dump-and-chase strategy.
But much like football, when a team tries to go deep, you can play prevent defence and shove it back down your opponent’s throat.
Or sometimes you don’t even get a forecheck set up; you have three guys back defending, and still, somehow, the Islanders counterattack you with one guy and force your goalie into having to make a big save:
Or sometimes, yeah, you’re pushing up the ice, and the Islanders realize the chaotic Giraffe is grazing too far from home:
Pushing for offence can lead to counterattacks, but once again, it’s that Soucy/Myers combo going to work again. Carson prays he can break up the long pass, and when that doesn’t work, he just sort of stops skating. Then Tyler Myers sort of fences at the puck like it’s a six-fingered man, and once again, Kevin has to make a huge save.
Best he’s not wrong
Best PR team
The Canucks at least came out with some jump in the third period, even if it didn’t amount to much. They actually generated a few shots, a couple of which were as dangerous as your cousin.
My favourite part, though, was this pinch from Erik Brännström:
I know Garland has the point covered, and Erik did get the puck, but man, anytime a bubble player makes a reach like that, I always wonder if they’re going to be sent to the farm.
Not Abbotsford, but the farm where Andrei Kuzmenko and Daniel Sprong got sent to, to live with all their friends and my cat from when I was a child.
Best J-Pats Sobering Tweets Part One
There were two fake goals in this game, one of which showcased a gif that had the goal counted, would 100% have gotten Räty sent to the farm with my old cat:
Aatu trying to dangle out of his corner between two Islanders, right into his own GOTI? That’s not good.
Carson Soucy just going, “Eh F it, I’ll slide in the general direction of the puck; surely that’s a better decision than everything else I’ve done tonight,” is not great.
Raty then doing a drive-by of the puck IN FRONT OF HIS OWN NET, was mind-bogglingly bad. I cannot think of a way to offend Rick Tocchet more than by doing a fly-by of the puck in your own zone like that. Not taking the body, not boxing anyone out, but just sort of hoping you can skate by really fast and win a stick battle.
Luckily the goal didn’t count, so none of this happened. Nobody has to get mad and/or sent to Castle Fun Park.
Fun fact: The goal being called off legitimately got the biggest cheer of the night.
Best J-Pats Sobering Tweets Part Two
This goal was fun because Fil Hronek seemingly thought going down on one knee and staring into his own net was the correct way to defend, and JT Miller stopped skating and just watched from afar, like a lone luddite watching over his farm, knowing that the machines won:
Also, see how Quinn Hughes got walked? He rarely, if ever, gets walked, yet there is Bo Horvat dangling around his stepson.
THAT is a real assist, Bo; that is one you can be proud to have your name on.
Do the right thing. Decline the assist on Scott Mayfield’s goal. You know in your heart you don’t deserve it.
Best advice
Hey, look, the Canucks scored!
Just kidding, pig man punched it in. One angle they showed in the arena made a good case for him punching forward with his hand, and I am here for a debate about whether it hit his stick or not, but also, the Canucks lost really badly, so I kind of don’t care?
Let’s just say we’re all adults here; we all know this goal wasn’t turning anything around.
I mean, Nils probably really wanted a goal so he doesn’t get sent to the meat farm in his “does Rick hate me? Am I the next Sprong,” dance he has going on. But other than that, this goal wouldn’t have amounted to much.
Anytime we get the feeling Rick Tocchet doesn’t love a player (showcased by not getting minutes in a third period), I always tell myself I’m crazy and that everything is fine, but then that player gets traded.
All of which means I feel like we’re all sort of waiting to see if Nils gets traded for Marcus Pettersson, right?
Best calling it down the middle
Engvall got a breakaway, but he hit the post, although a penalty was called on the play. So even if he had scored, it wouldn’t have counted:
This was a convoluted way of just pointing out that the Islanders didn’t relent and that the Canucks never really did much of anything in the third period, despite the fact it was their best period.
Best if wishes were fishes
I would give a lot of money for the real Fin to dish real talk like this, but alas…
Legally I have to show you the Islanders scoring their fifth goal on an empty netter:
Weeeeeeeeeeeee.
Best chaotic finish
You know who shows up when you least expect him?
The Chaos Giraffe.
Down 5-1, with a few minutes left, of course, it’s Tyler Myers freezing two Islanders with a fake shot before dancing around them and picking low corner for his first goal of the season.
Rick Tocchet spoke about fans not getting their money’s worth, but seeing a Chaos Giraffe goal live and in person? That’s not the worst thing in the world.
Best damning stats
It’s not often you see Quinn Hughes at the bottom of these, if ever, but he certainly had an off night for himself. Whether it was trying to do too much or merely being the victim of a guy tasked with playing for half the game when his teammates weren’t able to do much of anything, he was not a game-changer on this night.
And give kudos to Elias Pettersson because he was one of the few players who looked like he gave a sh*t, as he was attacking hard and working the board battles while killing a penalty in the third period. I don’t doubt all the players care, but when you shut down and just watch the game from afar when you’re pissed off, that’s when the fans get discontent.
Elias Pettersson out there banging away and going down with the ship? That’s the good stuff; you can sell that to the fans.
JT Miller barely finding the energy to backcheck and then giving a quick, “I’m just gonna try and be better next game I guess. No point of being really negative right now, I wasn’t good,” sound clip after the game, that’s when you get the fans frustrated.
But the recipe to fixing this, as always, is winning.
Win a couple of games, this all goes away.
Lose a couple of games, well, then I’m out here bringing up Jack Skille and waxing poetic about “the good ol’ days.”
Back-to-back games on Saturday and Sunday, you in?
See you there.
Best drinking spot
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