The cumulative season finale of these power rankings follows the same script as rest of them – Sedins at the beginning, a significant “Oh dear, these guys did absolutely nothing noticeable” drop-off somewhere between #8 and #12, and a predictable, unfortunate ending. 

Henrik Sedin had a really great year and finished up the season with a classic dad joke. He’s the best dad ever, no offense to my actual dad.  

Daniel Sedin also had a great year! It’s not always fun to watch goals that came in losses, especially losses like game 6, but man, how cool was this play?

These two are going together because they should always stay together. They were the bright spot on the rather unfortunate 2014-15 Canuck blue line. Tanev-Edler forever. 

Vrbata’s post-season didn’t look great, but hopefully he can Radim himself next year with more cool goals like this:

One of the best parts of this season has been watching Bo Horvat blossom into a speedy, strong, effective player. Even Johnny Hockey himself looks honoured to shake Bo’s hand. 

After one of the more impressive post-Torts bounce back seasons, Burrows was a big loss for the Canucks when he went down with an injury. He finished off his solid season by being a solid teammate. Sort of. 

Fan-favourite Eddie Lack was a big part of the team making the playoffs and will hopefully be back next season to continue winning games and doing whatever else he does.

Jannie Hockey fell to Johnny Hockey but he remains the Unsung Hero of our hearts. 

It would have been foolish to expect Ryan Miller’s first season as a Canuck to end neatly and without controversy. Welcome to Vancouver. 

I don’t know anyone who thought that Ronalds Kenins would matter this season and Ronalds Kenins was pretty cool this season, so he’s in the top 10. Some of this is probably due to Bo Horvat, but still, nice job by Ronalds. 

Before he fell off the face of the earth, Zack Kassian was having a pretty fun season and will hopefully do well next year. No Canuck did celebrations like Zack Kassian this season. He’s petting Linden Vey! He’s giggling! He’s SCREAMING AT LUCA SBISA! He’s howling like a scary little wolf puppy! 

Despite his career-best 18 goals this season, Big Shawn may be saying IDFWU to the Canucks this summer. At least he got to play a small role in one of Luca’s greatest pizzas. 

In my first power rankings, Nick Bonino ranked at the same number as his jersey number. Here he is again. Nice job, Nick and good luck at the World Championships! Please turn into Ryan Kesler while you’re there. 

Overall, Weber had an impressive season, contributing to the revival of the powerplay in the late regular season. To me, Yannick Weber is a useful player and the kind of defenseman that Benning would do well to re-sign for a reasonable price, though that doesn’t really seem to be Jim’s style. 

I hope Brad Richardson spends his entire off-season icing that foot and staying nice. Look how nice he is!

Maybe the Canucks lost in the first round because Chris Higgins’ beard was already too good and the Beard Gods could not handle it lasting more than 6 games. Chris Higgins, please control your Beard Hubris.

Maybe this year was just sort of messy because of injuries and Hamhuis will return in October totally healthy and ready to age gracefully and slowly. 

Sven Baertschi was probably one of the least relevant Canucks this season, though he had potential to become a legend. Maybe #svengeance will finally occur next season, during some meaningless regular season game in November. Sigh. 

Derek Dorsett was virtually non-existent in the playoffs and is almost definitely less of a mentor and more of an anchor to Bo Horvat.

Linden Vey was underwhelming all season. Also, doesn’t he know that throwing footballs has not worked for Pacific Northwest teams in the playoffs this year? Run it, Linden. Run it!

Aging and probably (hopefully?) hurt, Kevin Bieksa did not have a banner year. Also, the youthful Flames owned him with a meme. Poor Kevin. 

The supporting cast of defensemen did essentially all that was asked of them by the Canucks this season, which is more than one could say for some of the top-6 guys, but what can you do? 

Oh, I feel bad for this guy. He gets waived by the worst team in the Western Conference. He gets picked up by his hometown team. He immediately becomes the least memorable player on said hometown team. Fans ask “Who?” when he’s mentioned. There is mass outrage when he plays a playoff game. He scores the opening goal in game 6 and is finally celebrated. Until he’s called for a silly penalty that leads to Calgary’s fourth goal and the eventual downfall of the season. It’s almost as if this guy is cursed…………

The Globe and Mail’s David Ebner wrote a piece this week about the divisiveness of Sbisa and it’s worth a read, if only for this absolutely tragic restaurant story:

Sbisa seems like a really nice guy, but he’s also terrible at NHL ice hockey. Even if Sbisa was the world’s kindest soul, fans are justified in complaining about his inexcusable contract extension. That’s more on Benning than Sbisa, though, so maybe restaurant hosts should be saying “Jim, that’s the same name as the crappy new GM of the Canucks” (which would be totally weird because Jim is a super common name). Regardless, Sbisa isn’t good at all. I feel bad for him, but he is still not good. 

Remember when Marissa shot Trey on The O.C.? That’s what every McDavid vs Sbisa shift is going to be like next season. McDavid holding a smoking gun. Bieksa (Ryan Atwood, obviously) semi-aware of what just happened. Luca lying on the ice looking shocked. Imogen Heap’s ‘Hide and Seek’ playing. Mmm whatcha sayyy.