Canucks Player Power Rankings – March 9th, 2015

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Before I get to the Canucks themselves, let’s acknowledge Patrick Marleau, who was probably more key to Saturday’s victory than most Canuck skaters. 

1. Eddie Lack:

Despite the best efforts to his teammates, Eddie Lack had a nice week in the crease

2. Random Versace:

Redeem Velociraptor is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill, fifteen percent concentrated power of will, five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain, yet neither ESPN nor his own team’s twitter seem to remember the name :(. 

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3. Henrik Sedin:

Henrik Sedin is the first player in history to score 900 points as a Canuck and is the 4th all-time highest scoring Swedish player in NHL history. Henrik Sedin rocks.

4. Daniel Sedin:

Henrik has become The Scoring Sedin of late and to no one’s surprise, Daniel has assumed his role as The Passing Sedin quite gracefully:

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5. Zack Kassian:

Zack Kassian is sporting spring’s hottest smouldering smokey-eye look this week:

6. Bo Horvat:

What’s a Finn to a god?  

7. Alex Edler:

In his return to action, Alex Edler has seemed less set on taking on his role as #1 defenseman and more set on stirring up some goaltender controversy while Miller is sidelined

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8. Dan Hamhuis:

Dan Hamhuis had a nice week except for the humiliation brought upon by his ex-billet family. I think it’s cute, Dan. 

9. Shawn Matthias:

Matthias has cooled down a little bit, but just wait until the Stanley Cup Finals. Conn Smythe? More like Shawn Smythe. 

10. Alex Burrows:

Burrows probably deserves better than tenth on this list just for getting through a game on a line with Vey and McMillan.

11. Nick Bonino:

In and out of practice with a lingering injury, Bonino did turn out this pretty set-up for Vrbata’s even prettier goal:

12. Jannik Hansen:

Jannik Hansen got into a fight with a man who made Ryan Reaves bleed. And he lived to tell the tale. 


13. Chris Higgins:

Higgins scored a shootout winner this week and added a goal in Arizona but has now been sidelined with a mysterious lower body injury. At least it isn’t a mid-body injury!

14. Yannick Weber:

Unfortunately for both Yannick Weber and the Canucks, he left Saturday’s game with an upper body injury. On the bright side, the injury created an opportunity for this to be brought up:

15. Luca Sbisa:

Luca Sbisa is still Luca Sbisa, but at least here he Luca Sbisa’d the puck away from the back of the net:  

16. Chris Tanev:

Tanev practiced alongside Edler. Order is finally close to being restored. 

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17. Jacob Markstrom:

Here is Jacob Markstrom before his season debut. No need to mention anything else. All good. All smiles.

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18. Adam Clendening:

Does the return of Chris Tanev mean that Adam Clendening will be the odd man out on the blueline? The real question is: did anyone notice that Clendening was playing in the first place?

19. Ryan Stanton:

Ryan Stanton’s brother is a Medicine Hat Tiger, in case you’re wondering why he comes in on the list ahead of Frank Corrado. 

20. Derek Dorsett:

Because he was occupied, this lady watched Derek Dorsett’s life flash before his eyes on his behalf. 

21. Ronalds Kenins

This Latvian stock photo model was born for the day that Rony Kenins got scratched by Willie D.

22. Frank Corrado

Not really much to say about Frankie Corrado this week, except that he should probably be playing more. Also, his name sounds like a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. 

23. Linden Vey:

While in the Arizona desert, Willie D should have tried a bushel of tumbleweed on the first-unit power play to see if it was any more effective than Linden Vey. 

24. Brandon McMillan:

McMillan’s most memorable moment so far as a Canuck came when he inadvertently drew the ire of Mirco Mueller after Mueller tripper over Antti Niemi. That drawn penalty won’t be forgotten, Brandon!

25. Ryan Miller:

Since Miller hasn’t played in weeks, let’s look at this absolutely wild list of goaltenders who have played for the Buffalo Sabres since January 2014. The various Canucks goaltending situations over the past few seasons look downright normal in comparison:

26. Kevin Bieksa:

This week, Kevin Bieksa named all of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles except Corrado.

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27. Brad Richardson:

Apparently Brad Richardson skated this weekend but I’m not sure if I even believe he’s alive anymore.