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The Stanchies: Canucks’ 4-2 loss to Golden Knights means we are one game closer to ending this season
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Photo credit: © Stephen R. Sylvanie-Imagn Images
The Stanchion
Mar 31, 2026, 02:26 EDTUpdated: Mar 31, 2026, 02:45 EDT
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John Tortorella’s debut for the Vegas Knights was a successful one, as he led his team to a 4-2 victory over his former clients in the Vancouver Canucks. Alas, Kellen Lain wasn’t on hand to raise the banner for such an accomplishment, reminding us that life is rarely fair.
Speaking of fair, unethical tanking was on the minds of Flames Nation, as they debated how the Canucks have been losing games this season. As someone who has watched every single game, let me assure you that they are simply a bad hockey team to the point that if they tried to unethically tank, they’d fumble that as well somehow.
This team is simply good at sticking to the script they’ve followed for the majority of the season:
  • Have a semi-competent first period in which you think to yourself, “hey that resembles competent hockey.”
  • Have a second period so horrid that you’d question if they had changed the rules of hockey since the last time you checked, where losing was now the point of the game.
  • Have a third period where both teams sort of settle into a defensive state until Adam Foote asks his Magic 8 Ball on when to pull the goalie so the other team can practice what it must have felt like to shoot on Dan Cloutier in the playoffs.
This is sort of how every game goes now. Sure, the vibes are better, and the team seems to be standing up for itself more. But ultimately, this is a team of mentally exhausted players who are praying for the sweet release of death the offseason. And you can hardly blame them because simply watching these games is exhausting. I cannot imagine the discipline it takes to end a shift with a solid dump-in from centre, knowing that this might be the highlight of your game, and still going out for your next shift.
The good news, as always, is that the clock continues to tick forward, and the games continue to dwindle. We inch closer and closer to a draft lottery that you have a sneaking suspicion still holds a grudge against you for something you did to it in high school.
The bad news is the Canucks need one more loss, or a Chicago Blackhawks win, to mathematically secure last place in the NHL. Push that bag of peas that you bought back in 2023 to the side, and keep that Baby Duck on ice for at least a few more days, because you can’t quite celebrate the best lottery odds yet.
Either way, this nightmare of a season is coming to a close soon. And much like the Canucks, we are going to keep going out there. Shift after shift. Until it’s over.
Let’s do this.
Best talking point
Nick Kypreos is not the most accurate of pundits at the best of times, but you truly have to wonder what this front office will look like next season.
A total overhaul feels like the most obvious move in this situation, but making the right call hasn’t been a specialty of ownership for many a moon, so we shall see.
Best magical moment
1,000 games played is a tremendous accomplishment, no matter which team you end up celebrating it with, even if the vibe is a bit like Mom’s new boyfriend of just under a month jumping into the Christmas photos with the family. Jennifer? Jessica? Whatever your name is, scootch over so I can get my arm around Mom.
Best it’s all downhill from here
The first big chance of the game was from the hands of the BRO line, not to be confused with the BRÖ line, when Brock Boeser found Drew O’Connor with a stretch pass, which quickly turned into a scoring chance for Marco Rossi:
I enjoy how post-trade deadline Brock Boeser has turned into a board play savant. If he’s not making the deftest tip pass along the boards you ever did see, he’s out here lining up and acquiring a target and launching the kind of accurate pass only a man who has to sweep the bangs constantly out of his eyes can make.
Best accidentally on purpose
Former Canucks legend Nic Dowd looked like he might have gotten his bell rung when he collided with Aatu Räty’s elbow in the first period:
The debate was whether Aatu Räty threw his elbow into the face of Dowd, or whether Dowd ran his face into the elbow of Räty, and after thinking about it and analyzing all the angles, I have to say I just don’t care. Please let this season end.
Best finding an emotional investment angle
One of the ways Vancouver ran into trouble this game was when their young d-men would jump up to make a play. A good example of this was early in the first period when defensively oriented Elias Pettersson jumped up to make a hit in the offensive zone, which forced the Canucks to enjoy the thrill ride that is forwards on defence:
Vegas didn’t score on that particular play, but it did feel like Elias Pettersson and Vittorio Mancini were the worst culprits on the night for this kind of play. Which to be fair, it’s hard to get mad at it at this stage. It feels like a young guy going out there trying to make a big play is at least entertaining, and maybe it gives the kid some confidence, versus playing in a shell and praying to only lose 2-1 on the night.
Plus, I don’t think there is much learning going on with this coaching staff and the roster at the moment, so you’re just kind of waiting to see when Manny Malholtra rides over the mountain on his horse to try and change the tides of battle at Helms Deep. If the kids want to explore some caves to kill some orcs, have at it at this point.
Vegas would go on the power play as a result of that odd-man rush; however, it was Vancouver’s Jake DeBrusk who would get the best scoring chance when he pressured Mitch “Coach Killer” Marner into turning over the puck in his own zone, nearly converting it into a goal:
Vegas would then bounce back from their failed power play by trying to storm the net with the puck, forcing Kevin Lankinen to stand his ground in the crease:
And then Lankinen was called upon to make a big save once more when Jack Eichel shimmy shimmy ya’d Fil Hronek and Zeev Buium off of him behind the net, allowing him to run a give-and-go with Ivan Barbashev that led to a shot in the slot for the former Sabre:
One of the signature moves of the Adam Foote system is having multiple players collapse on one player, then both Canucks releasing said player, which then allows that player to skate to the net unheeded. Eichel basically has a free lane to the net after his pass as both Hronek and Buium instantly forget he exists the second he’s handed off the puck.
It’s an odd system, but one I have grown to love.
And by grown to love, I mean live in constant fear of.
Best exclamation mark
Jeremy Lauzon, who my brain refuses to believe isn’t former MMA fighter Joe Lauzon, was caught on a pinch by the Vancouver Canucks, leading to an Evander Kane breakaway goal:
Not since Michael Bublé dangled around the pylons in the rink in his basement have we seen such a clean finish, as Evander Kane absolutely ethers Adin Hill on this goal. There was not a single brain cell in Hill’s body that believed Kane was going to cut to his left, so he went full bore on sliding to his right, leading to a delightful 360 spin of regret and lamentation from the Vegas goalie.
It was also a nice setup by Jake DeBrusk, who is probably still wondering whether seven-year NHL contracts can be terminated while still being paid out.
Best waiting for the collapse
With the lead firmly in their hand, Mitch Marner began the push back for Vegas, first by setting up Rasmus Andersson after dangling through the slot, before ultimately crushing Drew O’Connor with a body check:
I feel like Drew O’Connor is going to need a moment to adjust to his new life of being on the highlight reel of Mitch Marner’s Greatest Hits, somewhere I don’t think anyone ever expects to find themselves. You really have to get ahead of that one and warn your family about it.
Marner then pulled off a slick little passing play with Mark Stone and Ivan Barbashev, leading to a high danger chance from the Knights captain:
Luckily, no Drew O’Connors were harmed in the making of that scoring chance.
Best making saves and attending raves, forcing rhymes and committing crimes
With the Canucks’ defence very much a work in progress, it was no surprise to see the Knights force the young Canucks into turnovers.
A Zeev Buium pizza into the slot led to Shea Theodore unloading a wrist shot from the slot, forcing Lankinen into making a hard save:
Later in the same period, the Canucks would sort of take turns missing defensive assignments, as three players closed in on one guy, only for them to break off one by one so they could then chase down the puck, only to watch it get passed to a new open guy:
And getting back to the turnovers, Barbashev would later strip Vitorrio of the puck in the corner, leading to a Tomas Hertl scoring chance:
All of which is to say Kevin Lankinen had himself a solid game of hockey. He wasn’t being forced into making any egregious saves, but for what he faced, he did a reasonably good job.
Which, as my job review tells me, is enough that I won’t get fired. Remember kids, find that bar of competence and stick to it. Do too little? You run the risk of being fired. Do too much? You run the risk of being relied upon.
Find the sweet spot.
Best all good things
The Knights would finally solve Kevin Lankinen after Noah Hanifin did a little dance and made a little love and got down tonight at the blue line, leading to Tomas Hertl 100% accidentally passing the puck over to Rasmus Andersson for the goal:
I have played far too much Rocket League to not recognize when a dude is trying to score but accidentally punts the puck to a teammate by accident. Hertl pulls the puck to his right and tries to flick it in on the backhand, but there’s too much momentum on it, so it rolls over to a very well-timed, albeit lucky, pinch from Andersson.
Was it an ethical pinch? We might never know.
But the point is, Vegas had tied the game up.
Vancouver almost responded right away off of a tip from Linus Karlsson on a Liam Öhgren pass to the front of the net, but instead all he found was the cruel, harsh reality that Catan has taught all of us: iron wins games:
Of all the players we will watch next season, I am unreasonably intrigued to see how Öhgren fares. It just feels like with a bit more talent around him, he might take a giant step next season.
Or he retires from hockey and opens up a competing cat cafe in International Village called The Purr Factory.
Coin toss, really.
Best staking his claim
After almost two months since being traded away, the Canucks finally have a new leading goal scorer in Brock Boeser:
It was a clinical power play, with fast puck movement leading to a point shot/pass toward Boeser in the bumper spot, leading to a deft tip for the goal. No messing about, just moving the puck with purpose as they looked for a point shot into traffic.
Certainly nothing exciting about the goal, but the efficiency with which they went about it was worth a titter and a tip of the hat. Maybe at the market, you both go for the same cucumber and briefly touch hands, before pulling back and blushing shyly, neither one of you daring to put to words anything about the spark that the barest of touches just lit within you.
That kind of a goal, you know?
Best angry boys do angry things
Perhaps embarrassed by being scored upon in the second period by this Vancouver Canucks team, Vegas tried to make things physical when Linus Karlsson stood his ground on an exchange of thoughts near the benches, leading to a fight of sorts from Teddy Blueger:
It’s hard to get too fired up when a team that is in dead last in the league is throwing down. However, it still feels important to see the team stick up for themselves if for no other reason than they can avoid having to enter a blood pact like Toronto did after they let the Ducks murder Auston Matthews.
I will say there is truly nothing more disheartening than seeing a team fully disengaged when losing games, so kudos to the new culture carriers for showing some spirit in these losses.
Best what is happening
I never thought we’d see another team’s fan base use 2026 Kevin Lankinen as an example of a goalie who stops high danger chances, but here we are:
Best house of cards
And with that being said, Vegas began to solve Lankinen through sheer force of will and shot volume.
Sure, he stopped a semi-breakaway, but can he stop another semi-breakaway? Where does it end?
This goal is a perfect example of young defencemen trying to make a big play, only for it to blow up in their faces.
First you have Vittorio jumping up to make a play/hit on Mark Stone, and I have to say if you were to pick three players in the NHL you should never attempt that on, Stone would be one of them. The dude is the slowest kid alive, but has the most elite body positioning and stick work around, he’s basically Magneto if his power commanded rubber instead of metal.
So once Vittorio jumps up and Mark Stone teaches him a lesson, Elias Pettersson then overplays his hand by trying to make a play on Ivan Barbashev along the boards, but then loses containment on the middle of the ice when Ivan boxes him out and finds a now wide-open Shea Theodore.
If there was a new coach next season, this is the kind of video I would send them in the middle of the night with the eyes emoji.
Best doing the best it can
The Canucks second period collapse would continue when a Canucks forward gets caught puck-watching, allowing Reilly Smith to skate in absolutely untouched to tap in what is essentially an empty-net goal:
Marcus Pettersson is locked into a board battle, leaving Tom Willander stuck covering his guy in front of the net, which means a forward needs to cover anyone bull rushing the net.
So when Reilly Smith skates by his closest check, Evander Kane, who releases him for reasons (bees?), reminding us once again that Planet Ice both giveth and taketh, it creates a giant hole in the Canucks coverage.
Just another breakdown in a long season of them, though I suppose there is some relief in knowing that it’s your 1,000th game, so nobody can get too mad at you.
Best ethical stat
At least they’re consistent?
Best grinding out the third
With both teams firmly set on riding out the third with minimal interactions, Jack Eichel’s chance on an early breakaway stood out as one of the biggest highlights of the final frame:
There was a time when Marcus Pettersson didn’t do things like that. I promise you, you didn’t dream it.
Drew O’Connor then got one of the rare Vancouver chances in the last period when he took dekes and dangles out of the equation and simply rammed the puck on net down low:
With that solid scoring chance out of the way, the highlights began to dry up and trickled in in the form of whispers of a scoring chance. What this means is we have clips of Elias Pettersson and Drew O’Connor almost getting a scoring chance, which is the equivalent of drinking a Lacroix and getting a hint of flavour:
Meanwhile, Keegan Kolesar would get a semi-breakaway after Marco Rossi misplayed the puck at the blueline, leading to a Lankinen save:
And since imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, the Canucks then took their own semi-breakaway shot after Liam was sent in with speed off of a Hronek pass:
I would dress the third period up better than that, but it just doesn’t feel right to do that in the CanucksArmy Quinn Hughes Celebration of Life week.
Best final result
Where is the empty net goal, you ask? Right here!
To be fair to Vancouver, I don’t think they’ve given up an empty net goal after failing to win the icing call, so at least there is variety in that.
Another game. Another loss.
Onwards and upwards.
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