The Good and the Bad of this past week.
It’s Friday. So we close out the "Week That Was" with our latest volume of Cheers and Jeers.
We start with a hug for Bryz, a kick in the ass to the Canucks, and we tear into Duco for denying his true self.
JEERS to the Canucks effort level in EVERY SINGLE GAME so far this year. A 4-5-1 record through 10 games is obviously not good. But it’s not really much worse than this time last year, when they were 4-4-2. However, the Canucks effort level through these 10 games has been embarrassing, to the point where my daughter’s Tier 2 Atom team should consistently more effort in their exhibition games. Especially from three of your highest paid players: Daniel and Henrik Sedin and Kevin Bieksa. When are these three golden boys going to stop playing like meat sacks and get into this season?! They are not acting like the leaders that Canucks fans expect them to be. It’s time these three guys, and the rest of their teammates, strap on their workboots and get their hands dirty. C’mon boys – show your fans that you actually WANT to win a game.
CHEERS to Ilya Bryzgalov for his candid and frank interview following his Flyers’ 9-8 home loss to the Winnipeg Jets. What did he say, exactly? How about "I have zero confidence in myself right now". Or "I couldn’t even stop the simple shots". Or what about "I’m lost in the woods." Wow. If you want to watch the whole interview, go here. Can you imagine if Roberto Luongo gave this interview? I’m pretty sure the media would literally rips his appendages off his body, decapitate him, and put his bloody head on a spear and parade it around the Rogers Arena press area like a trophy.
JEERS to Mike Duco for doing a terrible job of concealing the fact that he’s a vampire. It’s pretty obvious if you look at his Twitter avatar which depicts him recently killing an innocent victim to satisy his own bloodthirst. But, dude, why are you hiding this from everyone?! Vampires are COOL now. You know… Twilight… True Blood… Vampires Diaries… Vampires are dark and brooding and mysterious. Plus, you went out searching for a Hallowe’en custome?! DUDE WTF! You ARE a Hallowe’en costume! This is all very disappointing, Mike. Quit lying to yourself. Quit lying to your teammates. Quit lying to your fans. You’re a vampire. Own it. Embrace it.
Returning to that Flyers/Jets game for a moment, CHEERS to both those teams for that ridiculous outcome. We haven’t seen a game with 17 goals since the lockout, so this really was a treat for fans. Since I didn’t have any emotional skin in this game, I was simply absorbing it for all of its weird, high-powered splendour. And it was wonderful. It was wonderful BECAUSE I wasn’t emotionally investing in either team. If this was a Canucks game or a playoff game involving a rival, I would have lost my sh#t. It was fun to just take it all in and laugh at the ridiculous way that game ended up. If you missed the action last night, just check the boxscore. It’s pretty amazing. In fact, go watch the highlight pack. All 17 goals in less than 1 minute.
JEERS to the Boston Bruins! Not only did they win the Stanley Cup over the Vancouver Canucks, but now they’re losing better than the Vancouver Canucks too! Boy, just when the Canucks were expecting a pity party for their obvious Cup Run hangover, the Bruins go and lose all sorts of games and stop scoring and Tim Thomas goes in the pooper and they end up in dead effing last place in the Eastern Conference. Man, even when they’re losing, the Canucks aren’t as good at it as the Bruins.
CHEERS to Thom Drance, Jeff Angus, Cam Charron and Wyatt "The Stanchion" Arndt. These four studly writers are finalists in the Province’s "Replace The KB" contest. All four fine gentlemen also happen to be writers and contributors to CanucksArmy and the Nation Network. You represent us well, gentlemen. Now, don’t f*ck this up. Ya hear me?!