The Vancouver Tim Hortons Ikea Canucks

The Stanchion
September 19 2014 09:41AM

hockey

"Mommy, who is Mr. GoodYear?"

This week word got out that Gary Bettman and the NHL turned down the idea of putting ads on NHL jerseys in order to create more revenue. This is good news, because it means we won't be confusing a corporate logo for a name bar anytime soon

The bad news is that some sports marketing experts scoffed at the idea that jersey ads are not in our inevitable, Skynet like future. In their world, Terminator 2 shows up to stop Judgement Day, except he's wearing a Nike jacket and holding a Louis Vuitton purse (let's assume he hides his gun in there). In case you want a stark reminder of what that future could look like, read past the jump (see what I did there?)

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It's the most wonderful time of the year!

The Stanchion
September 12 2014 09:12AM

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Who will be the recipient of the prestigious Fedor Fedorov Preseason Award this year?

Ah, how I love the smell of prospects in the morning..

OK, I probably could've worded that in a less creepy manner, but my point remains. After a long summer of inactivity and people trying to pretend to be interested in soccer, hockey is finally stumbling out of bed and starting to put its pants on. This process for most teams usually involves their younger players going out and playing in mini tournaments, such as the Young Stars Tournament that the Canucks, Flames, Jets, and Oilers are putting on this weekend.

The mere fact that hockey is back in any kind of form - I got so desperate for a hockey fix in August that I ended up watching the Australian hockey league. Go Mustangs! AIHL Champs! - is reason enough to be excited, but their is a particular kind of enjoyment I get out of hockey before the regular season starts. 

Read on past the jump to find out more, you know how this works.

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Benning and LeBron need to walk the walk

The Stanchion
July 10 2014 11:03AM

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Winning has a funny way of changing perceptions. When you win, all of a sudden everything you do turns to gold. You can stumble, you can make mistakes, but those get swept quickly under the rug under the bright lights of winning. Likewise when you lose, all of a sudden everything you do is seen as yet another sign of your incompetence. Anything you do can and will be used against you in the Court of Fan Opinion Law.

Mike Gillis enjoyed both sides of this equation during his time with Vancouver. Despite initial concerns about an agent with no previous front office experience running the team, Gillis quickly turned those criticisms aside by not only simply being different than his predecessor Dave Nonis (anything you do to differentiate yourself from the old losing regime is a bonus, which is probably why Dave Nonis, a Burke protege, was never really embraced in Vancouver), but more importantly, just by winning.

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Six Tips for Ryan Miller to survive in Vancouver

The Stanchion
July 01 2014 01:56PM

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Don't do this?

OK Ryan, you got your money, and you're all set to play hockey in a crazy market like Vancouver. Before the puck drops, however, I would like to offer up some advice on how to survive your three years in our beautiful city.

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The six steps to success for Jim Benning

The Stanchion
May 22 2014 02:56PM

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How does Jim get back here?

The worst kept secret in hockey was finally unveiled on Wednesday, when it was announced that Jim Benning had agreed to a multi year contract to become the GM of the Vancouver Canucks. Unlike Torts' inexplicable five year deal (I have to assume he has copious amounts of pictures of Aquilini doing something awful, like maybe eating a hamburger from 7-11), Jim Benning will most likely see out several years of his contract. 

This is Vancouver, however, so one can never be too careful about job security when running the Canucks. Today you're the General Manager firing the food workers in the arena, the next day you're at Costco eating the cheap hot dogs, because hey, a good deal is a good deal.

That's why Jim Benning should take extra care in certain areas to ensure his reign in Vancouver is a long lasting, memorable one. Now I can't help Benning out with particular roster moves, but I can help him out with regards to how he should carry himself in this market. After watching Mike Gillis yell at radio personalities like a disgruntled father who blames the divorce on the kids, after watching Brian Burke threaten everyone and their mother that he'd drive them to the airport, and after watching Dave Nonis cry the day he was appointed GM (#NeverForget), I feel I have a reasonable amount of knowledge to impart upon our new overlord that will help him out immeasurably. 

Read past the jump.. you know how this works, I shouldn't have to tell you to do this, COME ON.

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