January 02 2017 09:00AM
Another calendar year of Canucks hockey has come and gone. With the new year comes the opportunity for new starts and fresh goals. When I ranked the roster this week, I gave each of them a suggestion for their New Year's resolution. Hopefully they will all listen to me.
1. Bo Horvat:
Bo Horvat's New Year's resolution should be to keep being Bo Horvat. Bo Horvat is the most positive thing about the Canucks franchise right now and it is not all that close. The kid is snazzy.
The kid is also clutch.
And the kid killed the weird Oilers mascot with a lightsaber. I'm not sure what Star Wars has to do with this, but I love it.
2. Henrik Sedin:
He's only 6 points away from 1000 in his NHL career, so Henrik's New Year's resolution can be to reach that milestone. I think he will manage.
3. Alex Edler:
The Canucks suffered greatly without Alex Edler, whose return seems to have transformed them into an almost mediocre hockey club. His New Year's resolution should be to never get hurt again. Maybe in 2018, he can move on to displaying emotions.
4. Daniel Sedin:
Daniel Sedin's transformation from The Sedin That Scores Goals into The Sedin That Scores Goals But Also The Sedin That Shoves People More And Bleeds From The Mouth A Lot has been a lot of fun. But for Daniel, I think 2017 needs to be a year with more positive energy. Even out the thug life with the occasional bubble bath, Daniel.
Daniel Sedin has gone to his dark place. pic.twitter.com/QOBZmzuYNW— Wyatt Arndt (@TheStanchion) December 31, 2016
5. Sven Baertschi:
The Robin to Horvat's Batman, Sven Baertschi is making the most of some of those cool moves that Bo makes. I guess Sven's resolution for 2017 should be to make the most of all of those cool moves that Bo makes?
Baertschi scores on his own rebound, hopefully that's allowed. 😘 pic.twitter.com/PPWoMSS5Ed— Vancouver Canucks (@Canucks) January 1, 2017
6. Ryan Miller:
Ryan Miller gets two resolutions. First, he should aim to not be a Canuck when the year finishes because it really makes sense for neither party. Second, he should do this more. Wow.
7. Jacob Markstrom:
Instead of offering Markstrom some advice, we'll suggest a 2017 resolution for Willie D -
#Canucks WD's New Year's resolution: to play Markstrom more— Jeff Paterson (@patersonjeff) January 1, 2017
8. Troy Stecher:
Troy Stecher doesn't need a New Year's resolution because he is doing just fine as he is. Good boy.
9. Loui Eriksson:
Loui Eriksson's plan for 2017 should be to always play against players that are willing to give him this much space.
Loui Eriksson goal pic.twitter.com/SO29HIHAMB— GIF Grand Maester (@myregularface) December 29, 2016
10. Chris Tanev:
Like Edler, Chris Tanev makes a huge difference for this team and should resolve to just never get injured ever again.
11. Nikita Tryamkin:
Nikita Tryamkin is doing okay on the ice and is forming friendships off of it. He scored a goal last week, but his reaction to Sbisa's goal is what matters most. Hopefully, 2017 is a year of positive growth for Nikita (not physically - he is large enough) as he continues to adjust to the NHL.
Ben Hutton on Tryamkin: "He's saying stuff that's improper but he's so happy like when Sbisa scored he was like 'SBISA. GOAL'." #Canucks— Canucks Now (@CanucksNow) December 27, 2016
12. Alex Burrows:
The Alex Burrows renaissance has been fun to watch. He can make 2017 better by sharing more old hockey cards. The Grrreenville Grrrowl is now my favourite ECHL team.
13. Ben Hutton:
My dream for Ben Hutton's 2017 is that his ridiculous optimism is not crushed by anything ever.
14. Luca Sbisa:
All I want for Luca Sbisa in 2017 is for him to keep having an okay time on the ice and to keep making new friends.
15. Brandon Sutter:
Brandon Sutter's goal for 2017 should be to do less of whatever prompted this goal to be disallowed. No one is sure what exactly that is, but I guess he'll have to find a way to stop doing it.
sutter tips it in, his stick in front of the glove. and .. it's disallowed. huh pic.twitter.com/kuiKKv3EcX— Jason Botchford (@botchford) January 1, 2017
16. Jack Skille:
Jack Skille has put the puck in the net four times this season! His New Year's resolution should be to do that more, but not too much more because then it would all get too confusing.
17. Markus Granlund:
I feel like Markus Granlund did fine in 2016 so my only suggestion would be to add some enthusiasm to his blown kisses.
18. Jayson Megna:
Jayson Megna's New Year's resolution should be to be less controversial. No one wanted or needed any "Jayson Megna on the first line?" discourse in 2016 and we don't need it in 2017, either. May he find his role in this new year.
Nightmare shift for Megna there. And this is what it's come to. Watching Megna's shifts. 😐— Jason Brough (@JasonPHT) December 29, 2016
19. Brendan Gaunce & Michael Chaput:
My dream for both of these two is that they score an NHL goal sometime in 2017 because neither of them did that in 2016. I believe in you guys!
20. Jannik Hansen:
I hope that 2017 Jannik Hansen is the same as all previous versions of Jannik Hansen, but with fewer injuries.
21. Erik Gudbranson:
As he recovers from his wrist surgery, Erik Gudbranson can take some time to reflect on things. His New Year's resolution should be to not sign a contract with the Vancouver Canucks that is more expensive than Chris Tanev's current contract with the Vancouver Canucks.
22. Derek Dorsett and Philip Larsen:
Ideally 2017 will bring decent health to these two, because both of their injuries seem awful.
23. Alex Biega:
Alex Biega's goal for the new year should be to play a few more hockey games. He can't really control this, but hopefully it works out for him somehow.
24. Anton Rodin:
The Hockey Gods' resolution for 2017 should be to let Anton Rodin catch a break. At least he got to do the rookie lap thing.