They're not laughing with you, #Lumbus, they're laughing at you

Graphic Comments
April 27 2013 08:49AM

No disrespect, #lumbus, but this is just a pity fuck

Ok, maybe they aren't actually laughing at you, but that's only because they feel sorry for you. Look, Columbus, I'm all for joking around and having a little fun, but this #lumbus thing has got to stop.

Not only is it dumb, demeaning, childish and dumb, but it's also a subtle, ironic poke at your general ineptitude. Did I mention that it's dumb?

Seriously, club this one to death with a rock and put yourself out of your misery. It's for your own good.

I mean, when was the last time you saw the Habs and Bruins jokingly playing around with each other? NEVER, that's when. Because they hate and despise each other. Fans of these two teams will mock each other mercilessly, every chance they get. But that's because they perceive each other as threats. To paraphrase Gandhi: first they mock you, then they ignore you, then they hate you, then they mock you again:

First they mock you, then they ignore you, then, if you're lucky, they'll mock you again

But unlike Gandhi, you may still never win. Sigh.

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I can guarantee that all the "cool kids" you're joking around with would drop out faster than the Oilers looking for another lottery pick if you ever got close to winning a playoff round against them. Sure they might indulge you for now, but it's only out of pity and a lack of respect for you as a franchise. 

That being said, this is by no means the dumbest thing to be associated with the Columbus Blue Jackets:

There are dumber things in Columbus

So grow a backbone, Columbus, and stand up to these false friends that will turn on you at the drop of a puck. They aren't your pals. They are your competition. Demand some respect, and maybe you'll actually get some.

Speaking of backbones, it turns out that lumbus is actually a real word meaning either side of the backbone between the hip and the ribcage in a human. Considering that looks unlikely that Columbus would make the playoffs in either conference, and that they're moving to the other side next year, maybe this whole #Lumbus things is appropriate after all:

You can take the

I guess the bottom line is this: you can take the "Co" out of Columbus, but you can't take the "suck" out of BJs.

RECENT GRAPHIC COMMENTS

C867930d1f1ba5cf2b078a93d3bd1a68
I'm not a hippie or on welfare. I don't live in Kits, wear Birkenstocks or own an umbrella. I've never been to the Capilano Suspension Bridge, but I'm sure it's very nice. I have a mayor, not a crack addict. I drink pale ale, not Blue. And I call it a cabin, not a cottage. I can proudly say my team's been to the Stanley Cup Final in the last 45 years. They may not have won, but at least they got there. I believe in sunshine, not haze; heat, not humidity. And that sushi is a healthy and tasty meal. A coho is a fish. A ski hill is a mountain. And the plural of leaf is leaves. Okay? Not leafs. Leaves! Vancouver is the country's third-largest city, certainly the most beautiful, and the best part of Canada! My name is petbugs and I am a Canucks fan! ... You can find me on Twitter @petbugs13 or send your hate mail to petbugs (at) gmail (dot) com but it better be funny or it's getting plonked.
Avatar
#1 Steve_May
April 27 2013, 08:53AM
Trash it!
1
trashes
Props
1
props

You transposed the "Jeff Carter for Jack Johnson" and "Doug Maclean" part of your pie chart...

Avatar
#3 David
April 27 2013, 08:28PM
Trash it!
0
trashes
Props
2
props

As a CBJ fan, I think it is worse to be mocked by the fan of a team that won't sell out playoff games...OUCH!

Avatar
#5 Autor
April 28 2013, 01:25AM
Trash it!
0
trashes
Props
0
props

@Graphic Comments

He's exactly right! Ever listen to hockeycentral at noon? MacLean doesn't know anything about hockey, he seriously knows very little about our great game. Listen to that show a few times and its easy to see why Columbus sucked so bad for so long. Besides, Carter for Johnson isn't that bad of a trade, especially when you consider how much Carter hated Columbus. So yeah, your graphic is totally wrong. Luckily, you ended with "I guess the bottom line is this: you can take the "Co" out of Columbus, but you can't take the "suck" out of BJs" and TOTALLY REDEEMED YOURSELF!

Comments are closed for this article.